Our Shelter Home

Psalms 91:1
Those who live in the shelter of Most High will find rest in the shadow of the Almighty

What is a shelter? Shelter is a place of refuge, a place of rest, a place where we run to when there is no where else to hide from fear of death and fear of danger.

In real life when we go to shelter homes to escape from danger, we are safe physically but are we safe emotionally and mentally? We can escape from physical harm but we cannot escape from mental and emotional damage. When we live in the shelter of the Most High, we will find rest.

The biggest pandemic right now is fear. Fear has gripped the heart of many these days. It did not start post covid but it has been there for a very long time. That is the reason the Lord gave us scriptures in the Bible about fear. I know what it feels like to be afraid. Afraid of a mere human being, afraid of people around me, afraid of the schemes of the enemy, afraid of myself, afraid of false preachers, afraid of people who are deceptive and afraid of people who might use me and abuse me. Fear is the biggest pandemic. 

How do we overcome this fear? Some people are diagnosed with panic disorders, some undiagnosed, some are not aware as to why their mind races at a million miles an hour. How do you stop these racing thoughts, the racing heartbeat when you are in a fearful situation?

I wish there is a solution to this debilitating disease called fear and in a very medically apt way it is called anxiety. There is a scripture in the Bible that says : Do not be anxious. It is a commandment from the Lord. Do not be ( It is a continuous tense) a present situation of being in the constant state of fear and anxiety, So what must be do if the Lord tells us not to be anxious? What then should we do? The next line says but pray for everything and present your supplications to the Lord with thanksgiving.

How can I present my supplication of defeat in life with thanksgiving?  How can I be thankful to the Lord for my present situation? It is very hard but we must simply do it because it is a commandment. I always wondered why in the ten commandments God did not give a commandment not to fear. His very first commandment is to not have any other gods before Him. Whenever we see "gods" with a small "g" it means anything other than the YAHWEH GOD! We cannot have anything that we worship more than him in our lives. It could be our job, our family, children, job, ministry, so on.

When we keep ourselves ahead of God, then we are gripped with unnecessary thoughts. Thoughts like fear, and playing our what if scenarios in our minds which do not take us anywhere in our life.

I, therefore want to dwell in the shelter of the Most High will find rest under the shadow of the Almighty.

The question for us tonight is do you want to live and dwell in the shelter of the Most High God or do you want to dwell in the shelter of the gods of this world and have restlessness?

I want to dwell in  a place where I feel safe and secure and not afraid and anxious.

Because He tells me to do it, I will not fear. I will not be dismayed or discouraged. I will be at peace because I am living in the shelter of the Most High God.

Stay in his shelter, dwell in his presence and find rest.

Stay Blessed!

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                         

The cry of the Creator

Jeremiah 4:14
O Jerusalem, cleanse your heart that you may be saved. How long will you harbor your evil thoughts?

The book of Jeremiah is one of the most powerful books in the Bible with 52 Chapters.
I love the name "Jeremiah" not only because it is a powerful book but also because my long awaited nephew is named after the prophet Jeremiah.
Jeremiah was called by God to be a prophet to Judah. He faithfully confronted the leaders and the people with their sin. After surviving the fall of Jerusalem, Jeremiah was forcefully taken to Egypt. The word Egypt brings back memories of bondage, hard labor, plagues, the red sea and finally the redemption to the promised land.
Jeremiah remained faithful in spite of Jerusalem's destruction.
Years of obedience had made him strong and courageous. This is small introduction about the weeping prophet as well as his faithfulness and obedience to God.

Coming to the verse from Jeremiah 4:14
O Jerusalem, cleanse your heart -We can see in this verse the Lord is not referring to a particular person. He is telling to the whole of Jerusalem.
We can see the cry of the Lord the way he addresses Jerusalem by saying "O Jerusalem"
I want to personalize this and add my own name here : O Zion!
The cry of the creator ever since He breathed His pure breath into us is to live a life just like Him. In whole of creation, the Lord brought everything into existence just by saying a word- Let there be________ and it came into being. The Creator did not say -Let there be man. Genesis 1:26 Then God said, "Let us make man in our image, in our likeness. The creation of man was a combined effort by the triune God. "Let us make man in our image, in our likeness".
God took the dust of the ground (Genesis 2:7)  The Lord God formed the man from the dust of the ground and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, and the man became living being.
The word of His mouth did not create us. He had to take his precious hands to pick dust from the ground that he already created to create you and me and then he breathed life into us. He breathed His life into us- it is the breath of life. That is how man became a living being.
How marvellous are your works towards me O Lord! His ways are higher than our ways, His thoughts higher than our thoughts. It was a triune effort- the effort of the Father, The Son and The Holy Spirit.
The reason I am personalising this verse is because I am a unique masterpiece of His choice creation. When He breathed into me the breath of life, His plans for me were amazing.
But what did Adam and Eve do? They fell a trap for the enemy who came to kill, steal and destroy.
Adam and Eve's disobedience destroyed everything. The initial disobedience brought upon mankind a continuing effect of sin and death.

The word of God says that the wages of sin is death. What is sin? The transgression of law is sin and the wage or the pay for that disobedience or transgression is death.

In verse 14, God is pleading with Jerusalem to cleanse their hearts.
The reason God is pleading with us today to cleanse our hearts is so that we may be saved.Vs.14 How long will you harbor your evil thoughts? It is not the thoughts of our spouse, children, parents, siblings or our friends. It is a call to discard OUR evil thoughts.

I John 1:9 But if we confess our sins to him, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all wickedness.

If "we" confess "our" sins, he is faithful and just to forgive "us our sins" and to cleanse "us" from all wickedness.

Friends, let us therefore do an intimate introspection today to cleanse our hearts and discard our evil thoughts. The Lord wants us to do this so that we will be saved.
Isaiah 1:16 Wash yourselves and be clean! Get your sins out of my sights. Give up your evil ways.
The Bible is very personal and the Lord is very personally talking to each one of us today. Wash yourselves, get your sins, give up your evil ways.
Jeremiah 13:27 I have seen your adultery and lust, and your disgusting idol worship out in the fields and on the hills. What sorrow awaits you, Jerusalem! How long before you are pure?

How Long? The same God who questioned Adam and Eve hiding behind the trees he created saying " Where are you?" is asking you and me today "Where are you?"

He sees us in sin, he continues to persue us, run after us, and waits with open arms to come running into His arms just like the prodigal son.
The same creator who took the dust of the ground with his precious hands, died a brutal death. The hands that created us were not pierced then but they are now just to secure our eternity with Him.

Where are you? What are the idols you are worshiping in the fields and on the hills? What is it that you are in today that the Lords eyes are seeing you right this moment?
He sees our adultery, our lust, our lack of reverance just for him and him alone.

Who are you in relationship with that is causing disgrace to the creator who breathed the breath of life int us?

I chose to be faithful to him until my last breath on this earth.
This is the cry of the Creator today- to cleanse our hearts and discard our evil thoughts so that we may be saved.

Are you attentive to the cry of the creator today? Two Saturday's ago my eldest sister called me and informed that my younger sister's father in law was in a critical condition with abdominal aortic aneurysm. I was awake all night fearing to hear the worst news that he is gone. Next day my younger sister texted me saying " My father in law passed away"
My heart was so sad. I wept bitterly because uncle Paul was a sweetheart and a person that dearly loved me.
The next few hours my husband and I started planning to drive down to his funeral.
Friends, his funeral is over and hes burried deep in the dust of the ground from where he came. On our way home from the funeral I hear another news that one of my other dearest uncles passed away.
It was one blow after another. Why I write this is not to scare you but to prepare us that life is short. Death is certain. We all must die one day.
What next? Are you prepared to live with our creator for eternity?

If so, heaven is a prepared place for prepared people.

Two days ago, our oldest daughter Jordan asked me if she can get baptized. I asked her why and in her little words she said to me "Mom, I want to know how it feels to be cleansed by Jesus."

Do you want to know how it feels to be cleansed by Jesus? If so, accept Him today as the Lord of your life. Tomorrow is not promised. This very moment is yours.

Would you come to him right now and ask him to cleanse you today of all your unrighteousness and he will.
The wages of sin is death but the gift of God is eternal life.

Jesus took our wages of death and in turn He is promising us eternal life. Come to him now.

What is it that you need cleansing from? Let us introspect ourselves.

Who are you intertwined with? What are you thirsty for?

Matthew Chapter 7

Vs.16You can identify them by their fruit, that is, by the way they act. Can you pick up grapes from thornbushes, or figs from thistles?

Vs.17: A good tree produces good fruit, and a bad tree produces bad fruit.Vs.18: A good tree can't produce bad fruit, and a bad tree can't produce good fruit.

Vs.19: So every tree that does not produce good fruit is chopped down and thrown into the fire.

Vs.20: Yes, just as you can identify a tree by its fruit, so you can identify people by their actions

I stand amazed at how Jesus loves trees so much. In the beginning when he created the heavens and the earth, one of his most precious creation was the land. In the book of Genesis 1:11 God said "Let the land sprout with vegetation-every sort of seed bearing plant, and trees that grow seed bearing fruit. These trees will then produce the kinds of plants and trees from which they came. Vs: 12 says: Their seeds produced plants and trees of the same kind. And God saw that it was good. This was his THIRD DAY of creation.

It was God who, in the very beginning of creation, ordained that every tree should bear the fruit of its kind. No good tree will bear bad fruit and no bad tree will bear good fruit.

Jesus compares two types of fruits here: Figs and grapes. I am sure he loves these two fruits. Everywhere in the Bible He mentions about the fig tree and about the grapes,the vine and the branches.

John 15th Chapter. He even compares himself to the true grapevine. That is one of my favorite chapters in the Bible.

Jesus tells us that grapes can never come of out of thornbushes and you cannot pick figs from thistles.

Apple juice can never come out of grapes and grape juice can never come out of apples.

Having studied my Agricultural Sciences, plants and their qualities always intrigued me.

A plant or a tree cannot come up on its own. You need to prepare the land first, for a seed to be sown. You just cannot sow seeds anywhere you like. We need to do something called Preparatory cultivation. We need to break all the soil, take out all weeds and unnecessary material from the soil and make it available for the seeds to be sown.

Once we do all that, then we need to make furrows and ridges and then sow the seeds. Once done, then you need to water them and after few days based on the quality of the seed, a little sapling comes out. If the seed is dormant, then you do not see any sapling coming out of it.

That is how important the quality of a seed is. A good seed will produce a good plant and vice versa. The cycle goes on and on. God ordained in the beginning that every tree will bear fruit of its own kind.

My parents cannot give birth to you or your parents give birth to me, right? They bore me and not you. I gave birth to my little Jordan, I cannot give birth to your child.

It is the same principle here in the Bible. Jesus compares us to a tree in the Bible and he clearly mentions that if we do not bear good fruit, then we will be chopped down and thrown into the fire.

Jesus does not just ask us to bear any fruit. We need to bear good fruit. People identify us by our actions. Our fruit is nothing but our own actions. When you identify yourself as a Christian, are you also identified by your actions? Or are you just identified as a hypocrite? Imagine my name is FIG and my actions are like thistles- so sharp and dry and of no use to anyone.

What good am I? I need to be cut off and cast into fire.

Friends, for us to bear good fruit, we need to be in a place that is fertile. A place that will enhance our multiplication. A tree cannot bear fruit without water and other essential nutrients.

I love the Psalms of King David. He is another lover of trees. Ofcourse! No wonder he was called the MAN AFTER GOD's own heart!

In the very first chapter of Psalms, he compares a Blessed man (who delights in the law of the Lord and who meditates on His law day and night) to that of a tree planted by the streams of water which bears its own fruit each season. The leaves never wither and whatever he does will prosper.

Many times, I live a life in which no matter what I do, I will not prosper. I am not preaching prosperity gospel here. I just want myself to be aware that I too, will be like the tree planted by the streams of water,bearing its fruit in its own season, with my leaves green and fresh, and with everything prosperous in my life when I delight in the Law of the Lord, when I meditate on His law day and night.

The Psalmist compares our soul to that of a DEER, and he compares water brooks to God.

Just as the Deer pants for water brooks, are our souls panting for God who so freely gives us living waters so that we will not thirst anymore?

Are the roots of our trees deeply rooted in Him and Him alone? Are they rooted into fertile soil( His word) ?

Are you prosperous(bearing good fruit in each season) or are you slowly withering away?

If you are not bearing good fruit, then sad will be your fate, my friend! You will be cast into fire for eternity.

Just because you are a tree you that does not mean you will bear fruit anyway. Just because that is your nature. You cannot bear fruit until and unless you are by the streams of water and until and unless you are close to the vine, you cannot bear fruit. You cannot be fruitful until you remain in Jesus (John 15: 4)

If you remain in Him, He will remain in you. You, my friend cannot do anything by being apart from God. You will be prosperous when you remain in Him and ask whatever you want, it will be granted to you. Whatever you do will prosper if you remain in Him. You need to remain in HIm and His words have to remain in you.

Friends, when things are going well, we feel elated. When hardships come, we sink into depression. But true joy transcends the rolling waves of circumstances. Joy comes from a consistent relationship with Jesus Christ.

When our lives (branches) are intertwined with Him(The true Vine) He will help us walk through our depression, our failures and our adversities. The joy of living with Jesus Christ daily will keep us level headed, no matter how high or low our circumstances are.

Therefore, we need to remain in our Lord Jesus Christ, we need to remain in His word, and we need to remain in His love. When we obey the LORD, His love remains in us and we will be filled with joy and your joy will overflow (John 15:11)

Finally, my friend- Be reminded that you did not chose God, God chose you and he appointed you to go and produce lasting fruit. Because His love remains in us, we need to love others, because He gives us joy that is overflowing, radiate that joy to others.

When you do what he wants you to do, then you will be prosperous. Ask whatever you want and he will give it to you just for His glory. (John 15: 16)

We need to love each other in the same manner Jesus loved us. He laid down his life for you. Imagine Jesus asked me to lay down my life for someone? It is so hard, isnt it?

All he is asking of you is to love others not to lay down your life for them. Friends, I know it is so hard to love someone who hurt you, someone who caused you pain. But we need to love them because Jesus loved us. Are you perfect? Are you pure? Are you holy? No we are not. I am not. I AM the greatest SINNER that ever lived on this planet. Just yesterday I finally could pray for someone who hurt me so badly even though those scars I still see to this day.

Isaiah 64:6 compares our righteousness to filthy rags. If our righteousness is like filthy rags, then what about our sins? Is there any other kind of rag it can be compared to?

How sad!! We look so lovely, so pure, so holy, so righteous to the world. How is Jesus viewing you today?

Would you like to rest in green meadows? do you love to be lead beside peaceful streams. I do. I want to sleep for a whole month undisturbed. I am so rest deprived after a long month of sadness by the loss of our second pregnancy and with the severe sickness of my little Jordan. I want to be lead to the green meadows and peaceful streams. My mum's friend: Auntie Beckie wanted us to come to her home to sleep while Jordan is resting. If she can offer me such warmth, what about my Father in heaven? Our shepherd knows very well that green meadows and peaceful streams will restore us. We will reach these places only by following him obediently. Rebelling against the shepherd's leading is actually rebelling against our own best interests. Next time you are tempted to go on your own way, be reminded of the Shepherd's way.

Are you leaning on your own abilities to rescue you, your beauty to restore you and your broken marriage? Are you leaning on your achievements to aquire love and affection from the world?

If so you are headed the broad way of destrution the eternal fire.

Come back to Him, take an exit now. Confess your pride, your arrogance and your ignorance and come back and be intertwined with the Lord to bear good fruit.

I still struggle to be intertwined with Him my precious VINE!

Oh! How I miss him today.. I just want to be intertwined to my Jesus now and forever. When I am in Him, I forgive, I love, I care, I rejoice in my trials, in my losses, in my suffering, in my pain, I bear good fruit and I will not wither away.

Galatians 3:13 But Christ has rescued us from the curse pronounced by the law, when he was hung the cross, he took upon himself the curse for our wrongdoing. For it is written in the scriptures, "Cursed is everyone who is hung on a tree".

Jesus, my friends, was hung on a tree for you and me. He took our curse, he took our sin, our guilt, our shame, our sickness and he redeemed us from them all.

The first tree brought sin and chaos into this world. The tree of knowledge of Good and evil and the final tree- the cross of calvary brought redemption and peace to mankind (Taken from my Pastor's sermon notes)

Let us therefore intimately introspect our lives: Why are you away from Him? Are you in Him, his love and His word? Or are you wandering away from him and withering away without His help?

Come back and be intertwined with Jesus. Are you thirsty for name, fame, success, money, riches which are all temporary or are you thirsty for living waters which are eternal? Come to him and he will fill you up so that you will not thirst anymore.

Who are you intertwined with? What are you thirsty for?

We think our prayers are not answered, our needs are not met, our marriages are still broken, our bank accounts are still dry, our debts are unpaid, bills are piling up with no help in sight.

Friend,the word of God so clearly tells us that whatever we ask in His name will be granted to us, will be answered by our God provided we remain in Him, we remain in His love, we remain in His word. Are you remaining in Him?

The meaning for REMAIN is to continue to stay in the same state or condition or continue to stay behind while others withdraw or it is to endure or persist.

If your prayers are unanswered, if you are not having a break through is because you are not intertwined with your VINE- THE LORD JESUS CHRIST!

Quit complaining about Him and start remaining in Him, His word, and His love.

As you listen to the song as the deer panteth for water.. let us intimately introspect our lives today.

Be Blessed and be a Blessing.

Everyday of my life was recorded in your Book-

Psalms 139:13-16

You made the delicate, inner parts of my body and knit me together in my mother's womb. Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! Your workmanship is marvelous-how well I know it. You watched me as I was being formed in utter seclusion, as I was woven together in the dark of the womb. You saw me before I was born. Everyday of my life was recorded in your book. Every moment was laid out before a single day had passed.

Friends, it has been a while since I have written my devotions. A lot has happend in our lives in a short time. Just two days ago I felt the whole world stopped revolving when I heard that our second baby 7 weeks of gestation will not be making it into our arms.

News of a positive pregancy can make a woman's emotions go high but feelings of uncertainity, fear of loss of the baby, still birth stories, miscarriages and sudden infant death incidents are unavoidable. You cannot avoid those feelings. One thing I know is that no matter what you think or imagine or fear, the Lord knows his plan for us.

Dreams of baby showers, baby clothes -what colors to choose- Is it going to be a boy or a girl? Are we going to have twins? Who is the baby going to look like? What are we going to name the baby?

Are we going to be in the same home when the baby arrives? Do these questions sound familiar to you? I was being bombarded by these questions as soon as I knew we were pregnant with our second baby.

Did you ever wonder about how the whole knitting in the womb happens? Do you think and believe it is evolution just like Darwin did or do you think it is the marvelous workmanship of the great giver of life-Our Lord God?

Let me start by narrating my joyful journey with you. God has taken me through an amazing process of thinking, thanking and testing and triumph as a result of this loss.

Whenever I see Jordan, I only feel sad that I wish this baby made it too so I could have a cute face like her just beside her. I dreamt dreams of Jordan having a little sibling.

But God had other plans:

This joyful journey began when my dearly beloved sister Julie Boles, wife of my OB/GYN, who delivered little Miss Jordan invited me to go with her and their beutiful daughter Abbie to go on a 2 day retreat to a conference called "DEEPER STILL" by Beth Moore, Kay Arthur and Priscilla Shirer.

We enjoyed our ride together for about 3 Hours to Birmingham Jefferson Convention Center. We talked about so many things, we laughed, we cried and we chuckled all along the drive.

We checked into the Hotel, had our dinner and then went off to the convention center that had about 14,000 women. We did not find any seats on the ground level, so we had to climb the stairs and made our way all the way to the top seats. I was so afraid to sit up there and seldom could concentrate on the 3 great speakers.

I knew something was wrong with me- I was getting breathless and anxious. I kept saying "Lord, please protect me from falling". I thought I will fall down and tumble down all the way to the feet of the speakers. Are you all laughing? That is how afraid I was.

The music is what was so enriching, the word was so encouraging. The song that touched my heart is "Our God is greater, our God is stronger, God, you are higher than any other. Our God is the healer, awesome in power"

I knew something was going on in my body but was not sure. I thought I could be expecting our second baby. I did not tell anything to Julie about my unsure pregnancy.

After having a great time of comfort, restoration through the word of God, we checked ourselves out on a Sunday evening- 5th December 2010 and Julie was playing her favorite song : Our God is greater- the same song that touched my heart.

We stopped at Cracker Barrel in Alabama to have our lunch. That is when I opened up to sweet Julie to tell that I could be pregnant but was not sure.Julie laughed and then did not talk about it until we reached Nashville. She looked into my eyes and said "Zion, you are pregnant". I said No I am not. She looked at me and said I was. I smiled back at her and was convinced that I was pregnant. She took me to the CVS Pharmacy and brought me a pregnancy kit to check myself out. She even bought two little pacifiers that said "DADDY I LOVE YOU" she put them in a little gift bag that had little footprints on it. My Baby's daddy is Jesus now. My husband feels sad but He is calm resting assured that Jesus has the Best plan for us.

I just couldnt believe what she was doing. She had the total faith that I AM pregnant.

I come home and check myself and lo and behold" I am pregnant" My result was +ve

I was so happy and excited. She asked me to text her back with a little + sign and said to keep it hush from my husband. I called her immediatey and told Abbie" Abbie, I am pregnant" She screamed and Julie was so happy for me. I am going to be a Mommy again. My happiness knew no bounds. Our God is greater, Our God is stronger, Our God is awesome in power.

I couldnt keep my secret. I told my husband I was pregnant. He did not believe it.

As usual he said He will pray about it. He did not sound as excited as he was when I was pregnant with Jordan. I was hurt and upset but he said he had his reasons. Reasons that this baby might not make it.

I kept the news to myself and my husband and Julie and Brent and to very few people.

I started praying for this darling baby of mine. That same night in our family prayer my husband read Psalms 139. I was unsure still. I couldnt believe I was pregnant. I was asking God for a confirmation- a clearer confirmation more than the CLEAR BLUE. I needed a CLEAR BIBLE confirmation.

The verse that brought confirmation to me was verse 13,14,15, and 16 from Psalms 139

For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made, your works are wonderful. I know that full well. My fram was not hidden from you when I was being made in the secret place, when I was woven together in the depths of the earth. Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book, before one of them came to be.

This verse gave me a clear confirmation that Yes! I am pregnant with our second child.

I started getting very close to my new baby. I prayed over him/her everyday whenever I ate, I walked, I slept and I woke up. Now this baby too was part of my day and night just like my little Jordie. I will miss the feeling of being pregnant and dreaming dreams of delivering a baby like Jordan. I wanted to name him Johan Charles Spurgeon. I consecrated him to the Lord to be a missionary, a preacher like my husband, my dad and my father-in-law. My hopes have all come crashing down but God knows that this baby will not be the one that I dreamt about.

He has bigger and better plans for me.

I was dreading something though. The day 28th December 2007 was when I almost miscarried Jordan. I was bleeding heavily was rushed to the emergency and the baby was still there with 163 beats per minute. The doctor in the ER said I have a 50/50 chance to carry this baby full-term.

But God recorded everyday of Jordan's life in His book. Jordan was delivered at 37 weeks- a beautiful baby so fearfully and wonderfully made by God's own workmanship. God reminded me that all my tears were take by God the Father to make her. Weeping lasts for just a night but my joy came in the morning. I delivered a healthy beautiful Jordan. She had a head full of hair and the Medical team in the Nursery put a little purple (royal) bow on the hair of our little princess.

Did you know that the same day December 28th in the life of my second baby was a nightmare?

Yes, I started spotting. I called Julie and told her about what I was experiencing. She scheduled me for an ultrasound.

My husband had a prior appointment to go and pray for a lady from the church who was about to go for a surgery. I told him I would be fine without him. I went for the ultrasound and the technician did not look very happy with what she was seeing and she refused to show me anything.

The radiologist walks in and then tells me that I am 7 weeks pregnant with no sign of baby's heartbeat.

I was so disappointed, hurt and sad. All I know was that my Lord is in total control of this baby and that everyday of this baby was recorded in His book.

My husband came to pick me up and I told him what had happened. We went to the Doctors office and he hugged me and prayed for me and said "Zion, it was worse with Jordan, but see what you have now, a beauiful, healthy baby". I and Julie will be praying for a miracle and he prayed for both of us. We went home. My hormone test was very promising with a HcG level of 25,000 and then Dr.Boles checked me again in 48hours and it dropped to 23,000.

I was having hope against hope that this baby will make it all the way through delivery just like Jordan did.

I was scheduled for another ultrasound on Monday 3 Jan, 2011 and my husband had a surprise preaching appointment at the Rutherford County Jail where he preached a sermon on - our God is a God of second chances. I told him the Lord's work is our priority and the Lord's will will prevail about this little one. So he went to preach and my sweet cousin Sarah Rose drove me to the Imaging center.

My husband met me there. We went in and my husband who can read images said that he sees the yolk sac, the baby with no heartbeat.

Same day 4th January 2008, I had an ultrasound impression that there was a live intrauterine pregnancy with 7 weeks gestation with a heart rate of 142 beats per minute. The same day 4th January 2011, the report said gestation and no heartbeat. Dont you think I was not wondering if God wasn't anxious about this whole ordeal? Yes, I was wondering but He has everything in control. He will never fail us.

I lost my baby at 7 weeks of gestation. Was I sad? Oh Yes! Heartbroken, devastated! Did I have words to thank Jesus? No, I dint. All I said was "Lord, I humbly bow down to your will".

Every moment was laid for this baby. He ordained every single day from the time of conception for this baby. Myself and my husband came home sad. Yet we knew that the Lord knew best for this sweet little one.

I will miss him/her for now and I know that one day I will see my little baby in heaven. I have a treasure in heaven now. I know the baby was meant to be mine on this earth but God had an eternal plan for the baby.

This verse always intrigued me: You knit me together in my mother's womb and that God watched this baby being made in utter seclusion and how the baby was woven together in dark seclusion. This made so much sense to me when I saw the gestational sac in which my baby was. A tiny 7 week old baby secure in the sac. Nothing pulled the baby out of the sac not even the pain and agony I was going through. That is how secure we are when we are in the Lord. Nothing should pull us out of the sac of his hands.

I delivered the gestational sac right after Brent and Julie Boles- My Doctor who left our home after a long visit with us. A visit filled with love, encouragement and comfort. I do not know what we would do without them and their love for us and our children.

Someone anonymous send me flowers from across the oceans, cards at our door step, phone calls from church, from our dearest Pastors, friends, comforting emails, visits.++

+ I was so glad that in this country where we are sojourners we have people who love us and care for us. What an awesome body of Christ who aches when we are in pain. Thank you all so much for being there for us.

What an awesome workmanship of the creator! A little sac- so transparent, so tightly sewn into the uterus of the mother. A tiny baby in it undergoing everyday of formation into a little baby one day to be delivered to step into this earth.

I just couldnt believe what I saw. I was amazed and knew that nothing like this could have ever evolved from an Ape. This is the total hand of the marvelous workmanship of the Creator and the sustainer of life.

How awesome are your works, Lord! After I lost the baby, the Lord comforted me with this verse from Psalms 16:10 & 11 For you will not leave my soul among the dead or allow your holy one to rot in the grave. You will show me the way of life, granting me the joy of your presence and the pleasures of living with you forever.

What an amazing assurance that the Lord granted the joy of his eternal presence to my sweet baby granting him/her the pleasure of living with him alone forever.

I am at peace because I have the presence of the Lord in me everyday. I am content because I contemplate his daily presence within me. As I understand the future he has for me and my children and my husband, I will ever continue to experience joy in my life. Hence I decided to base my life not on the present circumstances but totally on God.

The Lord began his process of healing my heart of this pain of losing my baby. It will take a while for me to come to terms with this loss but one day at a time sweet Jesus that is all I am asking from you. My sister is dealing with it even now since 4 months passed by after losing her baby. She conceived after 17years of trying to conceive. She got pregnant in May, 2010 and lost the baby at 21 weeks. It was a little baby girl- Grace Anne. My heart breaks for her and hers breaks for me.

Her due date for the baby to arrive is 15th January 2011. What will she be waiting for- heartache?

pain and sorrow? The baby is gone to be with Jesus. It is so hard. Very hard.

My dear friend Kate who had 3 miscarriages was encouraging me telling me that she has more babies in heaven than on earth. She has two lovely boys after each miscarriage. She still grieves the loss.

So many young women await to see a +ve pregnancy test, to get pregnant to give birth but so many young women are throwing their lives into the hands of sin, conceiving out of wedlock and aborting babies and abandoning them. Why is the question I ask. When I love children, my sister loves babies, why does it have to happen to us when the rest of the world is aborting babies left, right and center? God has a plan friends, He does and He loves me and my sister a lot and he is using this as a testimony for generations to come.

We comfort each other and encourage each other that the heights of joy will be ours when we finally rest in peace when we see Jesus face to face and our babies face to face someday in heaven.

My parents lost two grand babies this year. It is a big loss but this as my friend and sister Julie Boles always says: Is for a testimony. Our God is a God of second chances and He will use each and every circumstance in our life to restore, rebuild and rectify our lives.

He build mine and I am sure He will do the same for you today. I did not want to give any room for depression or sadness today because my Lord is still on the throne and he has me in the palms of his hand. All I know is if God wanted me to have this baby against all odds as he did for Jordan, he would have made the way for me to have this baby. He had a plan; He was the master, and nobody could destroy his plan. This removes all feeling of guilt from me ("I should have done, could have done or did or didnt do" that would have changed the way. All that love could do was done)-words taken from a card that one of our friends dropped at our door step who lost a baby themselves few years ago.

I am not guilty of anything because no one could destroy the Lord's plan for this baby-not even me.

Here are the words from an old song:

If I don't know the way, You know it.

If I don't know the plan You know it.

You know the time, you know the way

You know everything.

And I said, Lord that's it. I give it all up into your hands. You know the time; you know everything. I know nothing. I am sad and broken but now it's in your hands. Whenever I eat my food now, I cannot control my grief because I used to thank the Lord for the food and to also bless my baby and his/her growth in me. I am sad because who do I pray for now? God encourages me to pray for all the pregnant women to go through safe pregnancies. I now know the pain of losing a baby myself.

Friend's God made us for a better place and we have no choice but to rejoice when our loved ones have made their way to Him, while we mourn the loss of their departure from us. But we need to thank God for the hope of a joyful reunion that one day we will know in His presence.

These words comforted me from the card given to us by our dearest friends the Boles' who delivered our Jordan.

I know the sweet assurance that the Lord will turn my mourning into joy. I know one day I too will carry a beautiful baby in my arms who the Lord choses to keep with us until the purpose of his birth is served.

Friends, inspite of my pain and sorrow I am writing this blog just to make you all understand the beauty of God's intricate plans for your lives, for the lives of your children. I did not want to loose another second should your son/daughter, your child will not make it another day on this earth. If your child made it all through the gestation in your womb is because Jesus has a plan for him/her. Are you a faithful steward in raising that child? Have you done your job full measure in making him/her understand the essence of life? that there is no other way to the father other than through Jesus?

During my waiting time to hear about this new baby's heartbeat, during my cramping and pain and bed rest, my husband sent a little cross for me with Jordan and she brings it to my bed and climbs up on the bed, lays down beside me with her little head so close to me and said "Mummy, see the Blood of Jesus" I got shivers down my spine. I never spoke to her about Jesus' blood so far. I only told her Jesus is in her heart. I did not know how she knew about the blood of Jesus.

Psalms 8:2 You have taught children and infants to tell of your strength.

Jordan is taught by God and it is our responsibility to take her further in her walk with God. Julie always tells me that Jordan has strong anointing on her life and the way she spoke about the blood of Jesus rocked my world.

How many of you all have children that you don't know where they are tonight. Are they at your dining table or at anyone else's table? Do you know the pain that your child is going through? Are you there for her as a parent? Don't just take your children's lives for granted just because all was well during your pregnancy and when you gave birth to them. You will only know the importance of life once you loose it. Love them, cherish them, do not provoke them and do not hurt them in ways that they will remember for the rest of their lives.

Let us therefore intimately introspect our lives as parents. Did you raise your child in the way of life? Have you introduced Jesus to them? Are you walking with the Lord daily? If your child will not make it another day on this earth, where will he/she be? Is their eternal destiny secure?

What are you waiting for? Just do it friends. Talk to them and lead them to Jesus who died for them who rose again. Surely He has borne our griefs and carried our sorrows; Introduce Jesus to them. They came into your womb not by accident but because God is the architect. He planned your children and he breathed into their nostrils. He gave them a heartbeat and if their heart is still beating, dont waste your time. Just pray for them and lead them to Jesus before its too late before you dont see a heartbeat anymore.

This life is here today and is gone the next minute. There are no guarantees my friend. The picture attached is my +ve pregnancy test, my baby's gestational sac in a memory box that my sweet Julie gave me to remember that I have a baby with Jesus with a heart of gold.

The first day when we heard the news, I came home and burst our crying and then Jordan comes closer to me. She pulled her onesie closer to me and said "Mummy, your eyes are wet, come closer I will wipe them". I cried even more. If a little 2 year old can feel my pain, dont you think my heavenly father's heart is hurting for me today? Ofcourse it is. He just wants me to be stronger and he is only perfecting my faith in Him and His promises for me and my little family.

I love you and thank you for reading my blog today. Thank you Lord for bearing my sorrow so I dont have to carry it myself. Help me to experience your peace that passes all understanding. I want to feel the lightness of heart I know you have for me. Lord, I pray that you would take away any sadness I feel and evaporate all depression or oppression that hangs heavily over me as a result of my loss. I know my baby is safe with you. I love you so much because you know what is best for me and my little one.

May this incident bring glory to you alone and not to any man on this earth. Have you lost a little one like I did? Take comfort and courage. God is in control. The baby you have lost will not come back to you that is a fact but the babies you have in your hands now are your responsibility so work on their lives and be a great example to them for generations to come.

Be Blessed and be a Blessing

From my HEART to YOURS- Nehemiah 1

Dear Friends, Hope all is well with you. We are still in India after wrapping up with a 10 day mission’s trip along with Fellowship Bible Church.
I really miss Tennessee and hope to return back as quickly as we can. We are still waiting on my husband's visa approval and my request is that all of you will pray for an expedited approval from the US Immigration so that we can come home soon.

This is the first time ever when I came to India; I wanted to leave to come home soon. As so many thoughts keep bombarding my head, God has been speaking to me continually through the book of Nehemiah.
I read somewhere from the internet that someone called him KNEE-HIGH-MIAH!
A man on his knees!

Yesterday, God gave me and Jordan, the opportunity to spend a night with my sweet Mom and Dad. I enjoyed every minute I spent with them. Seeing both of them deteriorate in their health only makes me weep.
Whenever I go to India, my heart’s desire is to cuddle up with my Mom, and while I was lying down in the bed with Mum yesterday, I said to her "Ma, when I get to heaven, I really want to meet Nehemiah"

Reading this book makes me feel how awesome our God is. There is a way to get our tasks accomplished like the way the great Nehemiah did.
Nehemiah is the last of the Old Testament historical books. It records the history of the third return to Jerusalem after captivity telling how the walls were rebuilt and the people were renewed in their faith.

In the book of Nehemiah, I see that the biggest problem or task is that the walls have to be rebuilt. Everyone must be gripping and complaining about the problem, they might be scrutinizing and discussing and talking about the problem but Nehemiah stepped in and did something about it.

Nehemiah saw the problem and he was distressed. Instead of complaining or wallowing in self-pity and grief, he just took action.
I am a total opposite to the characteristics of Nehemiah. When I have a problem, I complain, I scrutinize, I discuss with people, I talk about the problem to people before I speak to God and listen from him, I complain, I wallow in self-pity and grief and I seldom do something about it.

God has been speaking to my heart so much through this task oriented Nehemiah.
When a great task is about to be accomplished, the opposition will be mighty.
Nehemiah encountered so much opposition and he did not succumb to the threats and insults, false accusations from the opposition party. He met the opposition, confronted injustice and kept on going with the help of His great God until the walls were rebuilt. Nehemiah was a man of action and not just words.

The walls of the city remained unrepaired, leaving its people vulnerable and defenseless. In Chapter 1, while Nehemiah was in the fortress of Susa, Hanani one of his brothers came to visit with Nehemiah along with some other men who came from Judah.
The first thing Nehemiah enquires was about the Jews who returned from captivity and how things were going in Jerusalem.
What concern for his kith and kin and what concern for his country!!

The response from these men in Verse 3 "Things are not going well for those who returned to the province of Judah. They are in great trouble and disgrace. The wall of Jerusalem has been torn down and the gates have been destroyed by fire".

What really impressed me in this chapter is that Nehemiah did not set up a meeting to discuss this matter with his friends or family or even with the men who just visited with him. He did not even call a friend like the way I do.

In verse 4, He sat down and wept. In fact, for days he mourned, fasted and prayed to the God of Heaven.

This is how Nehemiah prayed:
• "O Lord, God of heaven, the great and awesome God who keeps his covenant of unfailing love with those who love him and obey his commands, listen to my prayer!

He first worshipped the Lord God of Heaven, the God who keeps his covenant of unfailing love with only those who love and obey him.

• Look down and see me praying night and day for your people Israel.
• I confess that we have sinned against you, Yes, even my own family and I have sinned
• We have sinned terribly by not obeying the commands, the decrees and regulations you gave through your servant Moses
• Nehemiah is reminding God what he said to his servant Moses: If you are unfaithful to me, I will scatter you among the nations, But if you return and obey my commands and live by them, then even if you are exiled to the ends of the earth, I will bring you back to the place I have chosen for my name to be honored.
• O Lord, please hear my prayer! Listen to the prayers of those who delight in honoring you.
• Please grant me success today by making the king favorable to me
• Put it into his heart to be kind to me
If a normal cup-bearer, Nehemiah could pray this prayer what about you and I?

What is that unaccomplished task in front of you that you have been battling with?
I have been battling with so many issues lately. I confessed today to the Lord in shame that I did not pray like the way Nehemiah did. Listen to my prayer, O Lord!
Look down and see me praying night and day! I weep my eyes out when I am in distress in self-pity and grief. I learnt today that I need to weep before the Lord Night and Day to get answers.

Who is that Persian King you are seeking favor from? Is it your husband? Your boss?
Who is it? I have learnt today that I need to pray like Nehemiah: Please grant me success today by making the king favorable to me, put it into his heart to be kind to me.
You don’t put anything into your husband's heart to be kind to you. Pray for success from the Lord, pray to the Lord, your God to put the thoughts into your husband's heart to be kind to you.

If you listen and obey God's commands and live by his commands and just return to him wherever you are today, then even if you are exiled to the ends of the earth, He will bring you back to the place that He has chosen for you and I so that His name alone will be honored.

Heartfelt prayers like Nehemiah's can help clarify any problem you may be facing.
When God's people pray, difficult decisions fall into proper perspective, and appropriate actions follow.

What difficult decision needs to fall into proper perspective?

I have learnt a great deal today from Nehemiah and I thought this will bring some insight into your lives to intimately introspect your very own lives today and just fall down to your knees and just pray. Be action oriented!
I LOVE YOU ALL SO VERY MUCH

Are your sons like well-nurtured plants and your daughters like pillars sculptured in Palace styles?

That our sons may be as plants grown up in their youth; That our daughters may be as pillars , Sculptured in palace style (Psalms 144:12) NKJV

Then our sons in their youth will be like well-nurtured plants, and our daughters will be like pillars carved to adorn a palace (Psalms 144:12) NIV

The meaning of Psalms: a sacred song; a poetical composition for use in the praise or worship of God. David is a great musician and I always wondered why he was called as the man after God's own heart. I think that maybe it is because he loved to worship the Lord and sing unto him. David starts this Psalms by praising the Lord and thanking Him for what God means to him.

Look at the way he addresses His Lord in this passage in absolute worship and adoration to the Lord of Lords and the King of Kings.

This is the style of David's prayer:

1.Blessed the Lord: David starts the Psalm by saying "Blessed be the Lord and then uses the below words in worship to the great I am:

• The Lord my Rock, who trains my hands for war, and my fingers for battle


• My lovingkindness and my fortress


• My high tower and my deliverer


• My shield and the One in whom I take refuge

2. Bowed down to the Lord:

• Lord, what is man, that you take knowledge of him?


• I am just like a breath and my days are like a passing shadow

3. Beseeched the Lord: As we read from verses 5-14, David is beseeching the Lord and making his requests known to the Lord without worrying. David knows that he is praying to the Lord God Almighty who loves him, who will for sure deliver him from his enemies and knows that His Lord God will give salvation to him.

Today, while I was rocking our precious daughter Jordan to sleep, I love to play with her beautiful hair and as I held her close to me and moved her hair away from her forehead, just like the way my Mom did, tears just started rolling down my eyes looking at my sweet child.I did not know how to thank the Lord for His goodness in my life except to cry tears of joy.

As I was reading this Psalm today, the Lord not only taught me the style of King David's prayer but He also caught my eyes as I read Verse 12. A prayer for David's sons and daughters.
I wanted to share a little testimony about Jordan's birth.

Jordan is so precious to me firstly because she is my precious daughter, and secondly because I almost lost her when I was 8 weeks pregnant. Look at the picture this is how little Jordan was when she was just 8 weeks in my womb.
I can never forget the day when my husband rushed me to the ER as I almost miscarried her. Friends, in quietness there is strength. All I did that day was stay quiet and say nothing. Our God loves us more than we can imagine or fathom.

If God gives you the greater gift of life itself, dont you think he will give you the lesser gift of sustaining that life? -Quote from the book-Anxiety Attacked by John MaCarthur, Jr.

God sent that life to my womb and he proimised to sustain it. Why should I worry then?

My Doctor, Dr.Brent who is now a very dear friend of our family, prayed over me and said that I will carry the baby full-term and he scheduled an ultrasound for us to see the baby when I was 9 weeks. I am sure a lot of you remember the feeling that you had when you were going to see your first baby in the ultra sound.
I was excited and I thought I would see some little fingers and feet and head and nose and everything.. Do you know what I saw that day? I saw something like a little peanut with lips on it in a big ocean. Wow! I was so excited seeing these lips talk something to me. I asked the ultra sound technician what was that I was exactly seeing and she said "Ma'am it is the heart of your baby!"

The baby was still there in my womb. Praise be to the Lord who protected this precious baby from death. All I saw was that the baby had neither shape, nor form, just a heart beat.
God spoke to me that day. He said to me " Zion, my precious daughter that is how exactly you were when you were 8 weeks old in your mother's womb. No shape, no form but you had life, you were having a heart beat. I sent the soul into your womb first and then adorned the soul with a body and it took me 9 months to form a body around that soul.

Friends we all know that when we die, it is the soul that leaves your body and not the body that leaves the earth. What an awesome insight from the Lord as I saw this baby in me.
Everything amazed me about the womb, the soul in me, the little heartbeat and what an awesome architect we have!

Now Zion, please be aware that I have sent the soul of Jordan straight from my hands into yours and it is your responsibility to send that soul back to me.I was spell bound as I heard this from the Lord.

Friends, what is your response to this? How many of you believe that the soul that God has sent into your womb is straight from his hands to yours? He is the master orchestrator! When I think of the verse from Isaiah 49:16, I have engraved you on the palms of my hands. I imagine this great architect, the creator of life, shaping me and forming me and then engraving me on the palms of his hands. He has engraved Jordan's name on the palms of his hands. He has yours, your children's and your husbands.

When he has created us, our children, our spouses and has engraved all of us on the palms of his hands, are we lifting up the palms of our hands in Blessing that Lord? Are we folding the palms of our hands in bowing down to the Lord and are we crossing the palms of our hands to beseech the Lord for our children, our spouses, and our parents?

What is our style of prayer unto the Lord for our children today? Are you responsible for the souls that the Lord has entrusted to the palms of your hands? Look at the way King David prays for his sons and daughters:

That our sons should be like well-nurtured plants grown up in their youth and that our daughters like pillars carved to adorn a palace and as pillars sculptured in Palace styles?

Are you nurturing your children? I did not mean just physically. I meant spiritually. How many of us are giving a daily spiritual multivitamin to our children or do you think that they will grow on their own? Are you watering the life of your sons and daughters with the living waters everyday or are you allowing them to just adapt themselves to fulfill Darwin's theory : Survival of the fittest?
What a beautiful prayer my friends! I have never seen such a beautiful prayer like the way David prayed for his children. I would love my daughter Jordan to be like beautiful pillar that is carved to adorn a palace. The pillars in a palace are so different from the pillars in a normal home. We are a royal priesthood, a chosen generation of the Lord.

If we do not raise our children well, then can they adorn the homes they go into? Can they adorn the heavenly mansions and the palaces that the Lord is building for them?

Are your children like olive plants around your table? (Psalms 128:3) Where are your children wandering when you and your husband are having a meal? Are they at your table? or are they elsewhere at someone else's table? Are your children present at the time of your family prayer? A family that prays together, stays together. As for me and my family, we will serve the Lord (Joshua 24:15) Do you as parents bring your children to the altar everyday to pray as a family?

Friends, where is your family today? Where are your sons, where are your daughters?
God will not question anyone else in regards to your offspring. He will question you.

Do you pray for your children everyday? If you want your children to flourish like the palm tree and grown like the cedars in Lebanon, then you need to start praying for them, start sowing seeds of the love of Jesus in them.

Only the righteous will flourish like the palm trees and the cedars in Lebanon (Psalms 92:12)
those who are planted in the house of the Lord shall flourish in the courts of our God.The Palm tree is known for its longevity and erectness, the cedar for its might and strength.

What is the legacy you are leaving behind on this earth? God did not have to create you but He chose to create you for his own glory.

What is your role as a mother? How much time do you invest in these precious lives that the Lord has given you? Are you busy with your routine? Are you busy taking care of things that will soon perish or are you investing your time into the lives of your children to bring godly legacies into this world?

Proverbs 31:28 Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her. Many daughters have done virtuously but thou excelleth them all. (Proverbs 31:29)

Vent your frustrations and your anxities and your worries to the Lord who loves to hear from you everyday. Don't vent it on your children. I made a vow today to pray for Jordan everyday that she will be like a graceful pillar that I will have to carve everyday with the help of my Lord God so that one day she will beautify a palace.

Let us therefore intimately introspect our lives today: Are you praying for your children? If so what is your prayer like? Are you praying for success in career, success in marriage, success in all walks of life or are you praying that they will flourish and be like well-nurtured plants and graceful pillars to beautify a palace someday?

How many days have passed by that you did not talk to your child? How many weeks have passed by that you did not care to call them or nurture them or pray for them? Call your children and let them know what they mean to you and how much you love them.

Hold them close to your heart and love them like the way Jesus loves you. He loved you and I so much that He stretched his two hands and died for you and I and for our children and grand children.

Do you want to know what my little Jordan does when you ask her to pray? She lays her hands on our heads and says" dee father...tu tu tu tu..mumma..baaba(her dad)..amen.! We dont know what he means when she prays but I am sure the heavenly father knows what she is saying to Him in absolute love and adoration to the one who has engraved her on the palms of His hands.

Just see the picture I have attached in this devotional and ponder on God's love for you today and see how much you can love on your sweet children. Don't abort these precious lives even before they are born. They are souls crying out to the Lord when parents want to kill them for their own selfish gains.

I request a prayer today for all those mothers who are on the Hospital beds on abortion clinics who want to abort those precious souls- who they dont know may one day be the Billy Graham's or Amy Carmichael's or who knows who!

Be Blessed and Be a Blessing.















Children are a heritage from the Lord



It was a miracle that God protected Jordan until I delivered her when I was 37 weeks.

Are you living by Faith and waiting on the Lord for answers? Habakkuk 2:4

As I was writing the devotions on Faith, God inspired me today to write on how a righteous person should live. The book of Habakkuk is one of my favorite books in the Bible. I like this book because I am a questioner just like Habakkuk but many times I do not wait for answers like the way the Prophet waits on the Lord for all his answers. He was a man who sought answers for the difficult questions that were on his mind. He was troubled by what he observed. He saw a dying world and it broke his heart. He asked God questions like: Why is there evil in the world? Why do the wicked seem to be winning? Habakkuk boldly took all his complaints and queries to God. What do we do when we are bombarded by the same questions? We get depressed, we wallow in self pity, self-destructive attitudes, shutting up ourselves from the outside world or probably call a friend for answers just like the way they do in "Who wants to be a millionaire"

Friends, As you read this question and answer session between Habakkuk and the Great I AM, you will learn how to depend on God for answers. Habakkuk 2:1 I will climb up to my watchtower and stand at my guard post, There I will wait to see what the Lord says and how he will answer my complaint. What an awesome way to wait on the Lord.

After he waited on the Lord, in Habakkuk 2:2 the Lord replies Habakkuk. The Lord again tells Habakkuk in Vs.3 to wait patiently to see what the Lord said will definitely come to fruition.

During our faith series we have seen through so many examples how people have been healed. What brought healing to them? It was only faith. My definition of FAITH was Fantastic Adventure In Trusting Him or For All I Trust Him. Are we having that faith? See what the Lord says to Habakkuk in 2:4

The Just shall live by faith. Habakkuk questioned God : Why do the wicked seem to be winning? God replies him by saying that the wicked trust in themselves and their lives are crooked. But the just shall live by faith.

What category do you belong to today? Are you trusting in yourselves or are you trusting in God for all that you need?

Habakkuk trusted in the Lord for all his questions. The prophet concludes this book with a prayer of triumph or victory. Habakkuk understood God's power, His mercy and his eternal love as he sings his prayer in Chapter 3.

This is my favorite word from Habakkuk 3:17 : Even though, Even though, Even though... Friends, even though there is no happiness in your life, in your marriage, in your jobs or your relationships, even though there is no money in your bank accounts, even though there is no food on your table,even though your attempts to find the suitable husband or wife for you has failed, Let us see what Habakkuk says- Even though there are no blossoms on fig trees, no grapes on the vines, even though the olive crop fails, flocks die in the fields, cattle barns are empty,

YET.. this is the nail on the coffin. Friends this words sums it all. Yet, I will rejoice in the Lord. I will be joyful in the God of my Salvation. Now, that my friends is FAITH. You cannot just have faith and do things your way. You need to wait on the Lord. Without faith it is impossible to please God and without waiting patiently your faith can never be tested. Faith is patient endurance in the Lord.

You can never rejoice in this awesome God described in Chapter 3 until you make Him your Lord just like the way Habakkuk did. He says I will rejoice in the Lord, I will be joyful in the God of my salvation. No one can save you from what you are going through except the Lord God Almighty.

Trust in Him. The only way a righteous person can live is by faith not by anything else.

When you trust in this great God who is the Lord of your life He gives you strength, he makes you surefooted as the deer, and He will enable you to walk upon the heights.

In conclusion Galatians 3:11 clearly says that the only way a righteous person has life is through faith. No one can become right with God by keeping the law. Only Jesus Christ has rescued us from the curse pronounced by law. (Duet 21:22) Everyone who committed a crime worthy of death is executed by being hung on a tree. What crime do you think that this loving, caring, healing and awesome Jesus committed that He was hung on a tree? Nothing, my friends nothing. He became sin for you and me. He loved us even though we committed crimes worthy of death. We are the ones who should have been executed by being hung on that tree but He took that shame for you and me. He shed every drop of his redemptive blood for you and I.

If you still haven't made this awesome Jesus the Lord of your life, just kneel down right where you are and give your heart to the Lord. If you don't do it now, a day will come when every knee shall bow and every tongue will confess that He is the Lord.

Give yourself to the Lord in absolute surrender because the Just shall live just by faith.

Quit trying to be right with God by your own efforts. No matter how much you try you can never become right with God. Just yield to him. STOP and YIELD because only through the shed blood of our Lord Jesus Christ we can be made right with God.

His speech created the world, His breath created us but He had to shed every drop of His redemptive, cleansing blood to give us salvation and eternal life.

Let us therefore intimately introspect our lives today: Are you living by faith or are you living and trusting in your own accomplishments, your own pride, ego and your achievements? Are you waiting on the Lord at your watch tower and standing at your guard posts for answers or are you going crazy trying to get answers for yourselves?

Friends, I waited on the Lord for 7 years for him to fulfill His promises in my life. He fulfilled all that he promised me : Double honor instead of shame. If you are running the race with your own strength and walking this life with your own might, then you will get tired and weary but if you wait on the Lord, then you will have strength and you will mount up with wings like Eagles.

My life is a living witness of the goodness of my awesome Jesus and his redemptive plan for my life.

How about you?

FAITH SERIES III Do you believe Jesus can make you see beyond your problems? Matthew 9:28

Matthew 9:29 Then he touched their eyes and said, “According to your faith will it be done to you”;
Passage for reading: Matthew 9:27-31

This passage in a nutshell is about Jesus healing the two blind men. In the previous devotions, we have seen the faith of the woman with bleeding, the faith of the sinful woman and today we read about the faith of the two blind men who were following Jesus wherever he went. In verse 26, it says that the report of this miracle(Jesus raising the dead daughter of the leader of the synagogue) swept through the entire country. I am sure that is how these two blind beggars found about Jesus.
They have not seen Jesus but they believed that they are about to be healed. God promises a blessing to all those that believe in Him without seeing him. These two blind beggars were blessed because of their faith inspite of their physical blindness. Even though they could not see Jesus, they believed in Him.
John 20:29 Then Jesus told him, "Because you have seen me, you have believed; blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed."
These two blind men followed Jesus shouting , "Son of David, have mercy on us!! They were not only following Jesus but they were shouting and calling on his name. These two beggars might have followed men and women, begging for mercy, shouting "Sir, Ma'am, can you help us? Please have mercy on us, please help us out! But now they have decided to follow Jesus asking him to have mercy on them.

Everyone knows I am a christian because my name is Zion and because I am a preacher's daughter, a preachers daughter-in-law and a preacher's wife; But the question is: Do I call on the name of the Lord everyday? What is my intimate life when it comes to my relationship with Jesus?

After they heard about Jesus, they were not just blindly following some person on the streets of the town. They knew who they were following. They knew He is the Son of David. Son of David is the popular way of addressing Jesus as the Messiah because it was known that the Messiah would be a descendant of David (Isaiah 9:7) He will rule with fairness and justice from the throne of his ancestor David for all eternity. Based on the above verse we see that the two blind beggars knew their Bible well. They called Jesus in the most authentic way. No one addressed Jesus like that and this I am sure made Jesus happy. Jesus was pleased by their faith. Without faith it is impossible to please God.
Hebrews 11:6 And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him.
Friends, these two blind beggars had just what they needed to please God. What was that? Their faith. The faith that this Son of David will heal them if they earnestly seek him.

Jesus knows the intensity of their faith but he questions them "Do you believe I can make you see?" (Matthew 9:28). Don't you think Jesus knows that they believe in Him? Yes, He does. He asks them anyways maybe to emphasize and increase their faith.

I love their prompt response to Jesus, the Son of David." Yes, Lord, they told him, "we do". (Matthew 9:28)
All along these two blind men called on Jesus as "Son of David" The minute Jesus asks them Do you believe? that is when they said"Yes, Lord" Here they have accepted the authority of the Lord. They did not answer him by saying, "Yes, Son of David"
They made Jesus the Lord of their life. Once they did that, Jesus touched their eyes and said "Because of your faith, it will happen" Matthew 9:29 Then he touched their eyes and said, "Because of your faith, it will happen". Vs. 30 Then their eyes were opened and they could see!

Two beggars who were once begging for mercy from people have now turned to Jesus for mercy. They realised that no one can have mercy on them other than God. They finally realised that it was no use trusting men. Psalms 118:8 It is better to trust in the LORD than to put confidence in man.
They put their confidence in the Lord when they said "Yes, Lord".

Had the song Amazing grace existed during the times of Jesus, the two healed men would have thrown their begging bowls away and ran from street to street singing "Amazing grace! How sweet the sound that saved a wretch like us, we were once blind, but now we see"

Amazing grace was written by John Newton, a slave trader in 18th Century, when he accepted the Lord after facing many near death experiences.
According to Newton, sinners were "blinded by the god of this world" until "mercy came to us not only undeserved but undesired ... our hearts endeavored to shut him out till he overcame us by the power of his grace."

We don't deserve mercy but God saved us because of his grace, his amazing grace. These two men recongnized their helpless estate and begged God for mercy. As soon as their sight was restored that is when they saw how deteriorated their lifestyle was, how shabby and torn their clothes were.

Jesus never pushed them away, he compassionately touched their blind eyes with his hands which will be soon crucified. Today he spreads out those two nail pierced hands to receive you and me with love to just trust in Him. Friends, believe me! It is a Fantastic Adventure In Trusting Him (FAITH) God works in mysterious ways in our lives. He worked in mine. When I was blind, wretched and lost, he made me see my weaknesses, he made me beautiful and he found me by his redemptive love.

Friends, let us therefore introspect our lives today:
Are you spiritually blind? Are you persistent and consistent in your relationship with Jesus?
Do you follow Jesus wherever you go? If you have nothing to please God today, just have faith in Him. He will redeem you from any situation.
Maybe your spiritual life is torn and shabby just like the clothes of those two blind beggars. Ask God to heal you of your blindness. Ask Him to show you the light of His glory.
Are you going from person to person with your begging bowl shouting and begging for mercy to redeem you from your circumstances or are you going to Jesus with open arms begging for mercy to redeem you? Are you living in darkness of pride, ego, resentment, and anger? These two men who were once in darkness came face to face with the Light of the world.

Go and spread the news of his miracles and wonders and redemption in your life just like these two beggars. Matthew 9:31 But they went out and spread the news about him all over that region.

Are you keeping the wonderful things that Jesus has done for you within your own boundaries? Spread the news, spread the news of his love, mercy and grace. Are you expecting wonders and miracles in your life without making Jesus the Lord of your life? Until the two beggars said "Yes, Lord", Jesus did not touch them. Do you want to be healed, redeemed from your sin, your problems? Just say" Yes, Lord I believe you can do."

Are you thankful to Jesus for His grace for you? Let us intimately introspect our lives and believe in Jesus that if you believe in Him and earnestly seek him, He will reward you in due time.

Be Blessed and be a blessing.

FAITH series -II Are you in relationship with an exclusive Jesus? An Enticing woman, an expensive perfume and an exclusive Jesus -Luke 7:36-50

Luke 7: 50 Jesus said to the woman, "Your faith has saved you; go in peace."
Passage to Read: Luke 7:36-50

According to this passage, we see that this woman is branded as sinful or an immoral woman. This sinful woman from this particular city heard about Jesus' whereabouts and she followed him to the house of the Pharisee where he was having dinner. She did not go empty handed. She took with her an alabaster jar filled with an expensive perfume.

I can only imagine the picture of an immoral woman walking into the house of a religious, fault finding Pharisee with an expensive jar of perfume and the Pharisee must be thinking to himself "Aha! I am sure this woman is coming for me" But this woman comes into the house exclusively for Jesus. What does she do as soon as she sees Jesus?

• She stands behind Jesus at his feet weeping
• She was wetting the feet of Jesus with her tears
• She wipes the feet of Jesus with her hair
• She kissed his feet
• Pours perfume on His feet

All the above acts of the sinful woman shows that she has acknowledged her sinful life, her heart was broken, her tears had no end. She kneels down behind him in total surrender, her heart full of sin, shame and guilt. She was so sinful that she could not even stand before Jesus to face Him and His holiness. She kneels down to wet the feet of Jesus with her tears, lets down her beautiful hair to wipe His feet, kisses His feet with total love and freedom with no fear that she will be used in an unworthy manner, finally she pours perfume on His feet. Isn't that a beautiful sight to behold? Her act only shows remorse of her sinful lifestyle that she is ready to let go of.

A woman who was once seen on the streets enticing men, enamoring them with the perfume that she adorned herself from the alabaster jar, attracting one and all in perversion to the aroma of her body is now in the house of a Pharisee to anoint the feet of her new love none other than The exclusive Jesus.

This woman's sin was so famous that she was not called by her name, she was depicted as a sinful, immoral woman. Her beautiful hair that once drew men to her abode is now used to wipe the feet of Jesus.

The lips that she once used to commit sin are drawn to kiss the feet of the man who will now make her sinless. I kiss the two little feet of our little Jordan everyday- because I love her so much. No one kisses any one's feet if there is no deep love. This woman is kissing the feet of the man she is in love with who will one day soon die for her sins to redeem her and cleanse her from all unrighteousness.

She bowed down as a sinner in shame and dishonour and was raised up by Jesus as a new creation. II Corinthians 5:17 Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come! She sealed her relationship with Jesus by humbling herself in total surrender and Jesus sealed His relationship with her by cleansing her, making her his very own.

No one has ever loved her the way Jesus love would love her. She I am sure was never in love with any man that she ever encountered in her world of sin. She probably did what she did to maybe earn her livelihood and probably she bought the perfume in the alabaster jar with all her earnings. I don't know under what circumstances she ended up in a profession like hers;

But this poor woman who had no hope in her life, when she felt she was at the end of the rope in her life, when no man that she encountered could wipe the burdened tears of her heart that is when she comes running to anoint the feet of the Saviour of the World who takes away the sin of the world.

The reason she comes to Jesus is because she had the confidence that what she hoped for (to have a redeemed life, a sinless life) will actually happen. She could not foresee her salvation when she was in sin, but when she saw Jesus and humbled herself before His holiness in total surrender that is when she was healed from her sin. She had nothing left in herself except faith in this loving Saviour. That faith amidst so much pain and agony of sin is what redeemed her. That is when Jesus tells her" Your Faith has saved you, go in peace"

She finally realises that God created her so beautiful and that she should not throw her pearls before swines (Matthew 7:6) I read this from the book "Captivating" Be careful that you do not give something precious to someone, who at best, cannot recognize its beauty, or at worst will trample on it". This woman gave her precious body to everyman who did not recognize her beauty, they trampled her. But friends the beauty unravels when she seeks forgiveness from Jesus. Are you captivating Jesus or are you throwing your pearls before swines? Wrong relationships will make you remorse for the rest of your life.

Friends, without faith it is impossible to please God. Hebrews 11:6 But without faith it is impossible to please him: for he that cometh to God must believe that he is, and that he is a rewarder of them that diligently seek him. This woman believed that He is the loving, forgiving father and that he is a rewarder of eternal life that diligently seek him. This woman sought Jesus.

An enticing woman, an expensive perfume and an exclusive Jesus. Friends, do you know what I think of this woman? I feel that this woman would have gone back to the streets after meeting Jesus not to entice men but to invite people to encounter this exclusive Jesus. How many of us know Jesus and keep him to ourselves?

Jesus is indeed exclusive. He is exclusive because he heals both bodies and souls. He is compassionate and powerful. He is all knowing. Those who have faith in him will experience His power in both physical and spiritual realms. All he wants you to do is just surrender your life to him. Are you willing to give it up to him?

The perfume was dear to her, the alabaster jar would must be very expensive, but she opened it, broke it and poured the perfume on the feet of Jesus.

Let us therefore intimately introspect our very own lives today: What is it that is holding you back from coming to Jesus? Are you in pursuit of happiness in the wrong places, wrong people, wrong things? Is your sacrifice a sweet-smelling aroma to God that is acceptable and pleasing to Him? (Philippians 4:18)

What is God calling you to risk? What is he calling you to offer? Where is he asking you to step out in faith that feels scary to you?

Are you are calling yourself a Christian living a self righteous life and have never asked forgiveness from Jesus? Then you are lost. This woman did not have any good works to her credit, but she believed in the Lord, she trusted Christ and asked for His forgiveness and Jesus forgave her: Luke 7:48 Then Jesus said to her, "Your sins are forgiven." Many times we go to Jesus but we go with a stubborn heart with an unwilling heart to let go of our passionate sins to let go of acts that deny his presence in our lives.

What is the alabaster jar that you left behind that you are not willing to break and pour on the feet of Jesus? Are you feeling lonely, depressed, do you feel guilty of your past sins? What is burdening you right this very minute? You think you alabaster Jar is expensive? What do you think about the price of the blood of Jesus that we are not even worthy of? It is very expensive but He freely gave it to us. Just accept it. I John 1:9 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness

• Faith has changed her sinful life to sinless life
• Faith has changed her unforgiveness to forgiveness
• Faith has changed her tears of sorrow to tears of joy
• Faith has changed her sinful reputation to a saved reputation

In closing, I would like to add this true story that I got from the website of Cece Winans song Alabaster Box.

When my lover walked out on me, I cried, hollered, and screamed Oh God, please help me...PLEASE WRAP YOUR LOVING ARMS AROUND ME AND LOVE ME FATHER, BECAUSE IT SEEMS DEAR FATHER, NO ONE ON THIS EARTH WILL. That happened 2:00 a.m. on July 18, 2005. From that moment, I knew in my soul that God loved me and would never leave me. No longer am I lusting or in a relationship with men...but God has deadened my flesh little by little so that I can spend quality time in my salvation; understanding, walking, and living the word.

After reading this devotion, is that your prayer today? No one can love you like Jesus. No one can undo what you have done in your life other than Jesus, No one can be compared to his love, his holiness and his redemptive plan for you and for me. No one!! Who do you feel used you, manipulated you and left you lifeless? Give it up to Jesus.

Be Blessed and be a sweet smelling aroma for Jesus today.